Serenity Sundays

For quite a few months now, whenever I can remember I try to take Sundays and focus inwards. Practice as much self-care as I can possibly handle. Sometimes that means more and sometimes that means less. But, either way, I try to take a figurative q-tip to my brain and wash. Rinse. Repeat.

Initially this had involved waking up, having coffee and a full breakfast. Then firing up the YouTube and watching a few self-help videos. Then I discovered Josh Korda and the Dharmapunks. Which meant listening to some guided meditations. Afterwards I would take a shower in which I would put the stopper in the drain and turn it into a shower-bath-hybrid-thing. I would sit under the shower as the tub filled up and do my best to meditate and find whatever it was that was causing my anxiety.

I had read somewhere at some point that if you could hold meditative states under a waterfall, you could meditate anywhere. I don’t have access to m y own private waterfall, so a shower has to do.

So I would start with the breathing exercises and focus inward while trying to listen to every part of me until I found the stress points and then work them out through my thoughts. Listening to it was that had upset and registering it, allowing it to be. Not trying to solve the problem, but trying to decide if there actually was anything I could do about it.

And when the tub filled I would open the stopper and let the problems wash away with my problems. Then I would stand up and wash myself. Every bit of me. If my beard was growing out I would use the scrub I had. Wash my hair, and scrub every inch of my body. Then I would brush my teeth, shave and whatever other trimming was necessary. Nails, goat, nose hairs, all of it.

Usually around this time it had become mid-afternoon, so at this point (when it was warm enough) I would sit on the porch and type in my journal whatever else was left in my head. Just get it all out of my head. When I first started I found this was a lot more than later when it seemed the figurative cleansing was all I needed.

This was a good plan.

I’m thinking I need to get back into this. Sundays is a good day to let it out. I grew up in a Christian household, and we went to church if not every Sunday, very close to it. I liked the idea of cleansing your soul at the end of the week, and starting afresh each Monday. While I am not sure about where I fall with the rest of religion, I do like the idea of taking a day to go over your week and go through what could have been better or worse. Taking responsibility for the places where I missed the mark, and where I definitely nailed it.

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